


Wonderland

by Polkadotdotdot



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Drama & Romance, F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, Reylo - Freeform, Romance, Romantic Comedy, Slight Ben and Bazine, Slight Rey and Poe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:15:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28051515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polkadotdotdot/pseuds/Polkadotdotdot
Summary: Rey hates Rom-Coms.She hates the clichés, she hates how unrealistic they all are and really she wants no part of it. Even her best friend Ben Solo can't believe it.After a mugging on the subway, Rey is injured. How does one handle waking up to discover the world is now one big Romantic Comedy?(Isn't it Romantic AU)
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 3
Kudos: 17





	1. We're not in Kansas anymore...

**Author's Note:**

> This work was deleted (along with a few others) because it was unfinished and at the time I was on an indefinite hiatus from writing Reylo or Star Wars.
> 
> Consider me re-uploading an optimistic sign that these will be updated and finished at some point.

At 12 years old, Rey Jackson sat cross-legged in front of her TV, her wide eyes glued to screen watching Julia Roberts in the huge bubble bath. She was smiling that beautiful, Hollywood smile at Richard Gere. He was playing with the bubbles and the whole thing was in soft focus. It was the image of an ideal life, and an ideal story.

“You watching that nonsense again?” her Uncle Plutt grunted, wandering through to the living room from the kitchen, a can of Carlsberg in one hand and a lit cigarette in the other. The entire house reeked of smoke, the acrid smell saturated into the old council house.

He’d been her legal guardian since the death of her parents five years prior. Three years ago, his wife had walked out, leaving the already surly man a cynical, miserable shell of a person.

“You know that shit isn’t realistic right?” He said, taking a long drag of his cigarette, “That kind of perfect romantic stuff just doesn’t happen!”

“Yes, it does!” Rey said indignantly, still watching the screen. Plutt chuckled darkly.

“Nah, it’s all bullshit. Nothing in life is that perfect...those kind of relationships, they ain’t for people like us. You’ll never see folk like you and me in those movies,”

“Just because Aunt Carol left you doesn’t mean love still doesn’t exist,” She pointed out, immediately regretting her words. Plutt scowled aggressively stubbing out the cigarette on the ashtray next to the sofa.

“What did you fucking say to me?!” He snapped, standing his full height to tower over her, the movie forgotten as she cowered below.

The slap to the top of her head was sharp and stinging, but by no means as painful as some of the other hits she’d been dealt. Regardless, she held her crown and hissed.

“Get to your room you little brat!”

Scrambling to her feet, Rey made herself scarce, slamming her door closed to grab hold of her nearest bear while she bid the stinging in her eyes to subside. Lying on her shabby bed, she hugged the ratty old toy close to her chest.

Love was real and when she grew up, she’d find it.

**13 Years Later**

The piercing buzz of her alarm was an unwelcome intrusion to her otherwise blissful sleep. The second intrusion was smacking her head off the ceiling as she tried to sit up.

“Ow! Every fucking morning…”

The raised bed hadn’t been her idea, but her landlords, something that he insisted would create more space in her tiny studio apartment in Brooklyn. For all she had a good job, the single room dwelling with a tiny bathroom attached really was the best she could afford without having to take a commuter train each morning.

So for the bargain price of $1800 dollars a month, Rey may have woken every day with a throbbing forehead, but at least she lived close to her work. More importantly, she lived alone. Gingerly climbing down from the bunk, she wandered to the kitchenette, grabbing the dog food to fill her pet’s bowl.

“BB? Come on BB, breakfast time,” she yawned, the indifferent corgi wandering to the bowl only to stare at it and walk away, “Ungrateful little shit,” she muttered.

It wasn’t exactly responsible to have a pet in such a small apartment but ever since she’d found BB alone on the street so many years ago, he’d been part of her life, a fact she felt he needed reminding of constantly.

“You’d have been in the pound if it wasn’t for me!”

BB yawned in her direction. Deciding it was best to give up on her attempt to gain her dog's affection, Rey shuffled towards the shower to prepare for her day.

This was it, today was the day she was finally going to join the heads of department meeting and pitch her ideas. Having graduated from NYU, she’d been an architect with Resistance Designs for almost four years. She loved her job and was grateful for her position when so many others struggled. She had an assistant for crying out loud, but still while others were designing grand hotels, she was stuck designing the connecting car parks.

Not anymore. Today, she was going to finally work up the nerve to show them what she was made of.

Or so she kept telling herself in the mirror.

Upon leaving her apartment, there was another note stuck to her door.

_Finn, give me a call some time._  
_Ginger xx_  
  
Sighing, she ripped the note from the door, heading across the hall to knock for her neighbor. The door opened abruptly, her neighbor Finn standing there with an unimpressed look on his face.

“Hey, I think another girl mistook my apartment for yours,” Rey said cheerily. Finn took the note from her hands, his dark eyes quickly scanning the paper, “So, Ginger huh? She sounds new,”

“Uhuh. Bye,” He didn’t even look at her as he slammed his door in her face.

“Finn Gunnery. Total fuckboy,”

00000

There was nothing special about her street. She lived within her means which meant renting her tiny apartment in a less than desirable part of the city. The place was lined with convenience stores, bargain bins and more than one deli, her morning normally met with men shouting things in Polish at one another.

An uneventful subway ride with a pitstop for coffee and Rey made her way into the office, anxiously wanting to get to her desk. As she walked through the room, Dopheld Mitaka suddenly stopped her.

“Hey Rey, could you do me a favor and get rid of these for me? I’m super busy,” he asked flippantly, shoving an empty coffee cup and bagel wrapper into her hand.

“Oh, um...sure, don’t see why you couldn’t but...okay,” she muttered fumbling with her own coffee, bag and the garbage he’d just deposited into her hands. Really she should have said something to him the first time he’d asked. Now there was less asking and more assuming which lead to her juggling his mess every morning.

Sighing she continued on.

“Rey, I’m going to need you to make a call to maintenance,” Gwen Phasma called to her from her desk, “The 3D printer is running a little slow,,”

“But...isn’t that your job as the office manager?” Rey asked tentatively. The statuesque, blond woman raised a perfectly manicured eyebrow, aghast at the very idea.

“Darling, I have enough to do without spending my whole morning on the phone to that lot. Be a team player dear and get them on the phone, please?”

“I mean...I really...Yeah, alright,” she reluctantly agreed, mentally adding it to the checklist of all the other tasks she had to do that day. Finally, she reached her own desk, her assistant Rose already sitting nearby.

“You really shouldn’t let them walk all over you like that,” Rose warned, “Honestly, you said yes once and now look, they just totally take advantage!”

“And _you_ shouldn’t be watching full-length feature films at work,” Rey drawled, noticing the Wedding Singer clear as day on Rose’s monitor, “That movie is so old anyway,”

“But I’ve never seen it and I’m dying to know what happens!”

“I’ll tell you what happens, she ends up with him and it’s all romantic, cliché bollocks. It’s just all so unrealistic! Life doesn’t work that way, nothing is every wrapped up in a neat little bow with everyone singing songs and walking off into the sunset!”

“Wow, that’s so cynical!” Rose laughed incredulously.

A shadow fell over their desks, the light blocked by a wall of chest covered with a black button down shirt. Ben Solo stood leaning on the wood, a cheery smile on his face, his long dark hair falling effortlessly around his jaw.

Rey returned his expression, feeling an odd sense of relief that he was there. Ben had been working with the company almost as long as her. He was the first person to be nice to her the day she started and the closest person she had to a best friend.

“Good morning ladies, what are we talking about?”

“Rey here hates rom-coms!” Rose informed him with a smug smile, relishing in the surprise on Ben’s face.

“You do? Are you kidding?” He asked, “Have you _seen_ Notting Hill?”

“They are toxic!” Rey insisted, “They rely on the world being so perfect! Somehow every woman wears these perfectly constructed outfits _or_ they start all frumpy and all that’s wrong with them is that they need to take their glasses and overalls off! And don’t get me started about the cliché gay sidekicks whose sole purpose seems to be supporting the girl in finding her ‘true love’. Seriously, what do they do? Do they even have jobs?!”

Rose and Ben remained silent, stifling a laugh as she continued to rant.

“And what’s with the girl always being so _clumsy_?! In a movie it’s endearing but if it were real life, we’d all assume she had muscular dystrophy! And waking up in bed with perfect hair and makeup? Oh, oh, and those voice-overs to tell you the characters internal monologue so you know what to think?!”

“Alright, I think you’re maybe reading a little too much into it,” Ben chuckled, “Listen, ignore all that. Pack it away. You’ve got a meeting to go to,”

“Oh, no, please...I don’t think I can,”

“You absolutely can!” Ben insisted, “You are a wonderful architect and you deserve to have your ideas seen! I believe in you, and when you’re done...I’ll take you for a bagel,”

“I do like bagels!” Rey smiled at her friend, waving him off as he headed back towards his desk. Rose watched them carefully, smiling conspicuously.

“Want to know something else rom-coms have taught me? You are totally friend-zoning Ben!” Rose declared, Rey almost choking on her coffee.

“What? Ben? No, there’s no way!” She shook her head, pulling out her portfolio book to begin going through her plans, “He doesn’t like me like that,”

“Uhuh,” Rose rolled her eyes, looking back to her computer, “You can’t hide it. I know what I see day in day out. Maybe you’d see it too if you were more open?”

“Whatever,” Rey dismissed, checking her watch, “Shit. I’m already late!”

“Knock em dead tiger!”

Grabbing her designs in one hand and her coffee in the other, Rey hurried through the office. The issue wasn’t so much the meeting or even her ideas. No, her biggest problem came in the form of one man.

Poe Dameron.

The first time she’d seen him enter the office, he’d rendered most of the female staff speechless, standing next to Ben, she had been one of them.

“Oh...he is _so_ sexy,” Rey had said, literally feeling like she couldn’t breathe. Ben next to her was not nearly as affected, sipping his coffee slowly.

“Sure if you like that classically handsome, reeking of money type,” he shrugged, clearly bored already with the subject. Rey had rolled her eyes and teased Ben about his place in the office pecking order but since he’d arrived, she’d still never grown accustomed to Poe’s presence.

The meeting was already in progress when she arrived, stepping into the room nervously. The only free chair was the one next to the man himself but as she approached, she found the coffee cup being removed from her hand.

“Aw great, thanks sweetheart,” Poe smiled without actually looking in her direction. He took a long sip from the cup.

“I’m not the coffee girl…”

“Urgh, what is this? Who the hell puts whipped cream on coffee?!”

“I do...because it’s mine…” Rey defended weakly, her cheeks burning, mortified by the stares she was receiving around the table. Poe shoved the cup back at her.

“Why don’t you head out and get us some real coffee huh?” He said, still looking down at his notes. Rey dumbly nodded, wandering from the room, her fingers shaking as she held the cup. He thought she was the coffee girl. He hadn’t even looked at her face once and what’s worse, it had happened in front of her colleagues.

She was still trembling as she walked back to her desk, her eyes unfocused towards the floor.

00000

“The dude is an asshole, ignore him,” Ben insisted as they walked together.

Having arrived at her desk to ask her how it went, he’d found her trying not to cry over her designs, mumbling something about how whipped cream was a perfectly viable topping for a Starbucks order. It was then he’d gently removed the pencil from her hands, gripping her shoulders to pull her to her feet and guide her outside.

“It was so embarrassing!” she groaned, a fresh coffee in her hands, striding forward with no particular purpose other than to keep up with Ben and burn the anxious energy in her body, “He didn’t even look at me, then I get back to my desk and Rose is _still_ talking about rom-coms. It’s like I told her I don’t like ice cream!”

“You don’t like ice cream?”

“Not the point!” Rey huffed, “But it did make me think of another cliché they always throw in. The office rival! Why is it the main female character is always like, mortal enemies with the other woman in the office she works in? As if women don’t have enough problems in the workplace!”

Ranting while they walked, Ben moved to avoid walking into a couple standing together, the pair holding hands with eyes only for each other. Ben moved, but Rey did not, barrelling in between the happy couple as if they weren’t even there.

Ben smiled.

“For someone who claims to hate rom-coms, you know an awful lot about them!” He said. “You know your problem? You are so cynical that you don’t even see love around you,”

“What? That’s not true!”

“Yes it is!” he said, pointing back to the couple who had resumed their sickening public display of affection, “Look back there, see that couple? They were having a moment...until you shoved through them like a disgruntled linebacker!”

“Well it looks like they’re dealing with it just fine,” Rey snorted.

“You don’t see the things that are clearly in front of you, even the obvious,” Ben sighed, “By the way, karaoke tonight, you in?”

“Ooh, karaoke! Why don’t we just go trampolining naked in Central Park, that seems like an easier method of public humiliation,” she said sarcastically. Ben nodded, a flash of disappointment on his face that he quickly hid with a smile.

“Alright, you’ve made your point. Still, might be a good way to take your mind off this morning. A few drinks with your friend?”

“I’ll think about it,” Rey said, “I’ll need to go home first and feed BB,”

“That’s all I can ask,”

00000

Another day.

Another _shitty_ day.

The subway train rattled along with track, Rey’s body swaying, her hand grasping the handles above for balance. Maybe seeing her friends tonight would help? Not like she really had much to do hanging out in her tiny apartment with her ungrateful dog, listening to yet another random girl fight with Finn across the hall.

Her phone buzzed in her pocket.

_< Rose> Remember, be more open!_

Rey scoffed, shoving her phone back. Being ‘open’ had brought her nothing but problems since she’d been a kid. As she’d grown older, it hadn’t taken long for real life to crush her painfully naive outlook on love and life. Perhaps she was bitter, but being cynical felt easier than heartbreak.

The platform was quiet as the stepped out, heading towards the stairs for the short walk back to her apartment.

“Shitty fucking day,” she mumbled to herself, deciding that going out definitely wasn’t on the cards and the biggest decision she wanted to make was pizza or Chinese food.

Completely wrapped up in her thoughts of take-out, she barely had time to register the man rushing past her, his hand reaching to grab the strap of her bag over her shoulder. Instinctively she grabbed the strap, pulling against the tension.

“Hey! That’s mine, let go!” She cried. The man tugged sharply, pulling her towards him, his foot lashing out to kick her back. The pain that bloomed in her torso loosened her hand, her body stumbling back against the tile wall.

The back of her head collided with a crack and Rey was left in darkness.

00000

Lavender.

She could smell lavender. Why the fuck could she smell lavender when New York generally smelled of exhaust fumes, damp and the piles of garbage on her street.

Opening her eyes, her lashes felt thick and heavy, the room around her coming to focus but always with a soft sepia like glow. Sunlight streamed through a pristine window, the windowsill covered with pots of flowers, a light breeze shook the chiffon curtains. The sheets below her fingers were impossibly soft to the touch, the entire room comforting and warm.

“Ah, she’s awake”

Rey turned to the door, an impossibly handsome Doctor standing with a clipboard in his hand and a megawatt smile. A light layer of stubble covered his chiseled jawline, his blue eyes glimmering in the soft lights. Glancing to his body, Rey wondered if he’d chosen a set of scrubs that were a size too small on purpose, his chest fit to burst through the fabric.

“You took quite a nasty bump to the head,” He said, his voice smooth like velvet, “What can you remember?”

“I...I was in the subway and some guy tried to take my bag,” she said, reaching to feel the back of her head, “Where the fuck am I?”

“You’re in the emergency room,”

“No, I’m clearly trapped in a Nicholas Sparks movie…”

“That’s funny!” the doctor laughed, Rey bewildered as he threw his head back like she’d told the funniest joke of all time, “At least you’ve not lost your sense of humour! Now, sit back and relax, I’ll just have to give you an examination,”

Before she could protest, his warm hand was on her forehead, pushing her gently back to the bed as he shone his penlight in her eye.

“Oh, oh my…”

“What? Is everything alright?” she asked. The doctor shot her a sickeningly beautiful smile.

“It’s just...your eyes are so bewitchingly beautiful,”

Rey blinked up at him.

_What. The. Fuck._

_Wait, why can I hear my inner monologue like it’s being played back over a speaker?!_

_WHERE THE FUCK AM I?!_


	2. Down the Rabbit Hole

  
  


“Did I die? You are way too hot to be a doctor...and you’re saying the weirdest shit,” Rey said, blinking up at him incredulously. Doctor Sexy laughed again.

“I am so enjoying our time together,”

“Why? I am in the hospital!” She cried, scrambling out the bed, “I want to go. Let me go home!”

“Of course, you’re free to go,” he smiled, “But I’m afraid all your clothes were damaged,”

“All. Of. Them?” Rey bit out, his pleasant manner starting to grind on her last nerve, “Well, what am I supposed to do? Go out in this...oddly flattering hospital gown?!”

“Don’t worry, we managed to get you something suitable from the lost and found. I’ll get a nurse to bring it by for you,”

Rey was not too proud to admit she watched his behind as he left the room.

_Alright, I’m starting to see why women dig men in uniform...why the fuck am I still thinking out loud?!_

Moments later, a nurse appeared with clothes in her hands, laying the garments out on the bed.

“Here we go, I’m sure these should fit you,” the woman smiled. Rey examined the clothes, her nose wrinkling with distaste.

“A tea dress? A _floral_ tea dress?!” She cried, “Are you kidding me? What kind of 1950s, Stepford wife nightmare have I woken up in?”

The dress was perfectly nice, like something she’d imagine a housewife in a magazine spread wearing as she served cookies and milk to needy children, but it certainly wasn’t her style. Really if she had to define herself, it was far more the jeans and sneakers type of girl. Casual over couture. To match the dress, the nurse had added a delicate pair of sandals.

“Really? Are you begging for me to get a broken foot? I can’t wear those!”

_Not to mention I haven’t had a pedicure in...ever…_

“I’m sorry, but this is all that’s available,” The nurse apologized, “I’m afraid it’s this or the hospital gown,”

“Urgh. Fine,” she growled, glowering at the frilly, feminine clothes, beginning to dress once the nurse had left her alone. The tea dress hung perfectly around her knees, hugging her hips.

“Of course it bloody fits like a dream,” She said to herself, “This...this can’t be real,” reaching down she moved to pull the sandals on her feet only to notice that her toenails were shimmering with a pretty shade of pink, “Are you...did someone paint my toenails while I was unconscious?!”

_This is weird. This is really weird._

How the hell was her hair so delicately curled? Her makeup flawless? The last thing she remembered was some asshole trying to steal her bag, kicking her backward and hitting the subway wall.

“I’m concussed, that must be it. I’m totally just having some kind of head trauma induced episode and I need to call someone,” she muttered, reaching into her bag for her phone, “Come on...pick up…”

“ _Hi, it’s Ben, leave a message and I’ll call you back_ ,”

“Ben! Ben, it’s Rey, I need you to call me back as quickly as you can. I got mugged and I was in the ER and now everything is _weird_ …”

She hurried outside the main doors of the hospital, stopping dead in the brightly colored street. New York, the city she was used to, was fairly grey. People hurried past without a care in the world, the traffic fumes choked the air, horns from impatient drivers sounding all the while.

This was _not_ her New York. The air was oddly fresh, a mixture of jasmine and cotton candy invading her nostrils. People were dressed in brightly colored clothes, holding hands and smiling at each other fondly. On every corner, vendors were selling flowers, cupcakes, and coffee.

“Why can I hear Vanessa Carlton? Is someone playing a stereo?”

_Please God let someone be playing a stereo…_

Everything was just so...pleasant. It was disarming in the worst possible way. Stumbling forward, she began to walk out into the street, the lights suddenly changing and a black town car screeching to a halt in front of her. The passenger door opened, an all too familiar face jumping out.

“Oh my goodness, are you alright?” Poe shouted, rushing to her side to help her to her feet, holding her arms and gazing deep into her eyes. Rey blinked back at him, her face oddly blank with shock, “I’m sorry, my driver must have been distracted by your beauty. You are quite beguiling,”

“I...wait, what?” Rey blurted, “Why are you being so nice to me?”

“I’m always nice!”

“You weren’t nice to me this morning when you stole my cup of whipped cream and coffee,” she pointed out. Poe shot her a confused smile, his gleaming teeth glinting at her.

“I find it hard to believe we’ve met before and I don’t remember you,” he smiled.

“What’s going on?! This is wrong, this is all wrong!” she cried with frustration, “Don’t you see what’s happening? New York is _clean_! It’s clean and bright and it doesn’t smell like trash on the side of the road…”

“Are you sure you didn’t hit your head? Maybe we should get you checked out, or I could take you home?”

“Sure, yes...fine,” she sighed. At the very least, heading back to Brooklyn in a cushy town car would be better than braving the subway in open-toed shoes.

He helped her slide into the back of the car, the black leather soft as butter under her hands. Poe slid in behind her, still giving her a charming smile.

“Can I interest you in some champagne and strawberries?” he asked, popping open a hidden compartment to reveal a rather conveniently placed ice bucket. Rey glanced at her phone.

“It’s ten in the morning…” she gawked. Poe wasn’t listening, he’d already popped the cork and was smoothly pouring her a glass.

“Here is to chance encounters. Fate has brought you and your stunning beauty into my life,”

“Or your driver needs to pay more attention to people in the street,” Rey said dryly. The champagne was perfectly chilled but she didn’t drink slowly enough to really savor it. The world was going insane and alcohol seemed like the only remedy.

“Here we are!” Poe announced, the car coming to a smooth stop. Rey frowned, looking out the window after necking the last of her glass.

“What? How is that even possible? We were on the East Side...this is Brooklyn. That took like 18 seconds?!”

“Oh Rey, you’re so witty!” he chuckled.

“I didn’t tell you my name…”

“What a beautiful coincidence,”

“Uhuh. Well, yes, this is me so I’m going to go now,” she deadpanned, opening the car door and stepping into the street, “Wait, no, this isn’t me...this isn’t my street?”

Gone were the dollar stores, the deli, the screaming Polish men and bargain basements. Instead, every shop front was bathed in pastels, selling one of a kind books, gourmet coffee, flower and, of course, cupcakes. She spied her door.

“Why does it look like Hallmark vomited all over my neighborhood?” she mumbled to herself, checking her phone. Ben still hadn’t returned her phone call, only increasing her paranoia that somehow, in some way, he had something to do with this elaborate prank she was certain she was in.

“Are you sure I can’t get you something?” Poe asked. Rey shook her head.

“I think I just need to lie down,” she said, “Thank you, I guess, I have no idea why you’re being so nice to me. I don’t get it, but thanks,” She turned towards her door, Poe shooting out a hand to grab her arm and stop her.

“Hold on!” he cried, jogging to a nearby florist and grabbing a white rose, “If you need anything, please don’t hesitate to call me!”

He pulled a pen from his inner pocket, writing a number on each delicate white petal in no specific order before handing the rose to Rey.

“That’s my number!” he said proudly.

“That’s...very charming but you do realize there’s like a million ways this number could go together,” she said simply. Poe winked at her.

“But there’s only one you,” he said, walking back towards his car. Rey screwed up her face, the frustration in her building like a pressure cooker.

“That doesn’t even make sense!” she shouted, “Just to be clear, I cannot actually call you because this information is useless!”

“Oh Rey, are you feeling what I’m feeling?” he sighed, his eyes soft and dreamy. Rey stood gawping at him.

“No! No, I’m fucking not!”

Poe threw his head back, laughing in the same manner the doctor had earlier. While she was aware she had a very particular sense of humor, the men around her seemed to be acting like she was the most charming creature to ever exist. It would have been flattering if it wasn’t so infuriating, given that nobody seemed to be genuinely _listening_ to her.

_I need to lie down…_

00000

“Ben, will you _please_ call me back? Are you in on this? Is it because I didn’t come to karaoke with you?!”

If this was a prank, it was the most elaborate thing ever to happen in the history of pranks. Surely not? The scale of it all, the money it would cost, the coordination of so many people including their boss was on par with a Hollywood blockbuster production. There was no way any of this was happening for her benefit alone.

Walking down the halls of her apartment building, she could see the illusion carried on. The dingy hallway was brighter, painted in soothing cream and eggshell blue. The sconces didn’t flicker and the floors looked brand new.

“Oh good, gentrification in a day…” she scowled, finally finding her door to push her key into the lock.

This wasn’t her apartment.

“Sorry!” She called, “I’ve got the wrong place,” closing the door behind her again, Rey checked the number. 186. It was definitely her place.

Carefully she opened the door again, tiptoeing inside softly like a teen coming in well after curfew.

_Holy shit…_

Where was her dingy studio?! It was as if someone had taken every Pinterest board for picturesque apartments and crammed them into her living space. The living area was huge, a massive flat screen on the wall in front of a beautiful leather corner sofa, fresh flowers adorning the mahogany coffee table.

The kitchenette had been transformed into something the Kardashian’s would hang out in, the glass-fronted fridge stocked full of fresh food.

Rushing through the apartment, her bedroom was much the same, a huge king size bed covered in fluffy pillows and throws.

“Who even needs that many pillows?!” She cried incredulously, throwing open the double doors to her closet.

“Holy...what?!”

Rows of clothes, perfectly categorized and pressed hung on the golden rails. At the back of the room, rows of designer shoes and matching bags teased her.

“This is impossible. I’m dreaming. This is a coma dream and any moment I’m going to wake up in some shitty ER room and Ben is going to be there telling me…”

“He’s going to tell you how cute that outfit is girl!”

“AHH!”

Whirling around, Rey screamed at the sudden intrusion. It was Finn, only it wasn’t. Gone were the baggy pants hanging low on his hips, the oversized hoodie. Instead, he was wearing a peacock printed kimono, holding BB delicately in his arms.

“Finn? How did you get in here?”

“Someone said ‘Gay Beetlejuice’ three times and I magically appeared! How do you think I got in? I used to the key you gave me booboo!”

“Why are you talking like a Sex and the City cast member?” Finn rolled his eyes dramatically.

“Oh hun, that is _such_ a 1998 reference!” He giggled, “I told you I’d feed this little bundle while you were out! Who can resist this little face?” He said, smooshing BB closer to him, peppering his snout with kisses.

“What happened to my dog?” Rey asked, staring at the docile corgi. BB was almost smiling, his fur neatly shampooed and brushed with a large pink bow adorning his crystal-studded collar.

“Uh, he’s _fabulous_?!” Finn sang, elongating the word unnecessarily. Rey’s nose wrinkled.

Everything was just so _perfect._

“Come on you, we need to change whatever this is,” he flailed, gesturing wildly to her outfit, “and get you to work for that big presentation!”

“What presentation?” She asked, being turned and pushed further into her closet.

“I don’t know...the big presentation!” He shrugged, “So don’t wash your face, your perfect as you are, and I’ll drop you off on my way to do absolutely nothing at all!”

“You don’t have a job?”

“If you call swiping right a job,” he laughed, “Amirite booboo?”

“Uh...huh. Okay, I’m going to change then. I guess,” he mumbled dumbly, examining the racks of designer clothes and settling on the least floral printed or frilly things she could find. A pair of dark jeans and a crisp white shirt.

Finn leaned on the door frame of the closet, his hand dramatically on his chest as if he was viewing the sunset over the Grand Canyon.

“That outfit is precious. My god, I love you so much!” He gasped, his voice a strange whisper by the end.

Her apartment was something out of Ideal Homes magazine. Her fuckboy neighbor was a 90s gay stereotype. The whole world smelled sweet and she hoped the soft focus around her was more to do with the situation and less a warning of her impending brain hemorrhage.

“Come on, let’s hop on Sasha and I’ll get you to the office,”

“What or who is ‘sasha’?!”

“My moped you silly billy!”

_Of course, he owns a moped..._

00000

_Alright, so I’m in a coma dream. A coma dream where the world is perfect and I need to find a way out of this._

Perfection wasn’t her. Nothing about this was her, it was unsettling like an upset stomach, a strange ominous cloud that hung over everything around her.

Walking into the office, she was met with that same false perfection. Her co-workers were smiling at her happily, everyone greeting her like she was homecoming queen.

“Hey Rey, let me lighten your load! I’ll throw that away for you,” Dopheld Mitaka smiled, removing the coffee cup from her hand.

“Alright, but I wasn’t quite done with that…”

“Rey!” Gwen Phasma cried happily, falling into stride alongside her, “I noticed your 3D printer was running a little slow so I called ahead for you to get some pre-maintenance done for you!”

“Oh, you got something fixed for me…”

“Of course I did! I’m the office manager and _you’re_ the star architect!” She said as if it were the most obvious statement in the world.

_Star Architect?!_

Ahead near her desk, Rey finally spotted a familiar face in Rose, puffing a sigh with relief.

“Rose, oh thank God! The world has gone crazy. Everything smells like flowers and sugar, my neighbor Finn is setting gay stereotypes back fifty years and my apartment…”

“I’m sorry but _why_ are you talking to me?” Rose sneered, finally looking up at her phone. She was dressed in a skintight power suit, her hair slicked back in a high ponytail so tightly Rey could see the tension in her scalp. She raised a sharp eyebrow.

“Because we’re friends?”

“Friends? That's the funniest thing I’ve ever heard,” she deadpanned, still sneering at Rey like a bad smell.

_Oh no...the office rival stereotype…_

“Listen, I don’t work for you. I don’t like you and at the big presentation today, you’re going down!” She hissed, storming away, her heels clicking on the floor.

“Don’t be like that!” Rey pleaded, desperately looking around the utopian office for someone else who could help her.

Then she saw him.

“Ben!”

“Oh hey,” he smiled, bemused as she held him at arm's length, examining every inch of him, “What are you doing? Do I have something on my face?”

“You’re still _you_!” she cried, throwing her arms around him, squeezing him tightly. Ben gasped for air.

“Of course I am, why wouldn’t I be?” He asked. Rey gave him another look over. Same black button down shirt, same dress pants, same dark hair, and eyes. He was exactly what she needed.

“I don’t know how to explain this but everything has gone crazy!” She said in a hushed whisper, “Don’t you see it?”

“See what?”

“The bright colors? The constant scent of flowers? Rose is acting like a bitch and everyone seems to think I’m the next coming of architect Jesus!”

“Did you hit your head?” Ben asked carefully.

“Yes but that’s not the point!” Rey hissed, “Something is wrong, you have to believe me!”

“Okay, okay,” Ben soothed putting his arm around her shoulder, “I believe you. Listen, maybe this presentation is stressing you out? How about we take a walk, get you some fresh air?”

“And Rose? What happened to Rose? She’s so... _mean_!”

“She’s always been like that. Total bitch,” Ben snorted, “Let’s go for that walk. I really think it’ll do you some good,” he smiled reaching out his hand to her and wiggling his fingers invitingly.

“You can tell me everything from the start. Don’t worry, you’re not alone,” he smiled.

Rey uncertainty took his hand, relishing in the feeling of his fingers wrapping around hers, the warmth of his skin and the glint in his eye telling her he was still the Ben she knew. For now, that would have to do.

_If I’m going to be stuck here...at least I’m stuck here with Ben..._


	3. What's a Yoga Ambassador?!

The sweet smell of the air was making her feel nauseous. Or maybe it was the sickly smiles that everyone who passed gave her.

Central Park had never looked more beautiful. The sun shone high in the clear blue sky, illuminating the flowers all around them. On the water, couples sat in idealistic rowboats, kissing or simply making eyes at one another.

It was enough to make Rey bring up her coffee.

But Ben was there. Wonderful, dorky, reliable Ben who walked with his hands shoved in his pockets, intently listening to her story. The more she said out loud, the more ridiculous it sounded.

“I really think you’re just stressed,” he said kindly, “Relax. Breathe. Get a lungful of that sweet New York air!”

“Please tell me you don’t think I’m going nuts? You’re not going to ship me off to some weird, incredibly beautiful madhouse are you?”

“I don’t think you’re crazy,” he chuckled, “but you have to admit, the things you’re telling me does sound a little out there. You might just be seeing-“

“If you dare tell me I’m seeing things, believe me, nothing can make me _unsee_ my neighbor in a peacock kimono!” She wailed, burying her face in her hands.

Ben laughed again, kind and warm, wrapping his long arm around her shoulder.

“Okay, okay. Listen, we will work this out together, I promise.”

His body felt comforting against hers, like a safe harbor in a world that didn’t make sense to her anymore. It was illogical to be so afraid when everything was seemingly perfect but that was the problem.

Perfection didn’t last, it wasn’t real and giving in to the illusion was like standing on the edge of a cliff waiting for the inevitable push.

“I can’t do much about things just now, but would ice cream make it better?” He asked, nodding towards the cart on the path they were walking. Cute, umbrella-shaded tables surrounded the stand, people digging into their chosen flavors. Suddenly, he stopped, Rey almost stumbling.

“Oh my God, is that girl choking?” Ben gasped, his eyes widening towards the site ahead.

A girl with long black hair, clad in a red sundress and golden sandals, seemed to be struggling, her hands up around her throat in a dramatic fashion as she coughed and spluttered.

“She’s faking it. You know when someone grabs at their throat like that it’s all...Ben, where are you going? Ben?!”

It was too late. He was off, sprinting from her side like an honest to God hero towards the choking woman. Rey huffed, drearily stomping towards the dramatic sight. Ben had his arms around her, administering the Heimlich like he’d been doing it all his life.

The woman coughed, a delicate piece of cone dislodging from her throat.

_That doesn’t even seem like a thing...surely if would have just disintegrated._

“Alright, white knight, are you done? I think they have raspberry ripple...oh, or maybe butter pecan?” Rey said, peering at the ice cream stand.

Ben wasn’t listening. The woman turned around, her long hair flipping in the breeze like black silk, her dazzling smile enchanting those around her. Ben stood before her, blinking like he was in a dream and Rey could have sworn the world moved in slow motion for the briefest of moments.

_Can I hear violins?!_

“Oh my God, you...you’re…” Ben stammered.

“Bazine Netal,” she smiled, her lips a perfect bow of rosy pink, “I was so scared, I can’t thank you enough!”

“It’s no problem!” Ben blushed, “Rey, look who it is!”

Rey fought a scowl. From her place in the office, there was a window directly opposite her desk. Outside of that window was a billboard, advertisements rotating monthly with a new ridiculously stunning model to remind her that she didn’t look anything like them and that’s why she wasn’t good enough. Any time she turned to look Ben’s direction, she caught him staring out of her window.

So of course when Ben decided to save the day in bizarro world, Bazine Netal, spokeswoman for Covergirl Cosmetics, was the helpless victim of cone-gate.

“Really, I’m so grateful,” the woman purred, pointedly ignoring Rey standing there.

“I never thought I’d be saving a model’s life today,” Ben blushed, Bazine’s laugh like a tinkling bell, her hand touching his arm in a way that Rey did not like.

“I’m not just a model…”

“Oh yeah, you do that yoga show,” Rey said, Bazine finally turning to look at her.

“I’m a yoga ambassador actually,” she replied curtly, her smile returning when she looked at Ben, “Honestly, you must allow me to buy you a drink at least. To thank you for your bravery!”

“It’s not like he was fighting a bear…” Rey muttered.

“Uh...I mean I guess,” Ben mumbled awkwardly. Bazine fluttered her lashes at him, her smile as sickly sweet as the air around them. “I was kinda here with my friend…”

“Yup. His friend. Hello, I’m his friend.”

“Just one drink?” Bazine asked, her large eyes shining. Ben looked uncomfortably between the two women, before nodding.

“Alright, yeah. Sounds great!” He declared, offering his arm to Bazine, “Rey, I’ll see you back at the office!”

“What?! But you said we were going to work this out together?”

“And we will but, come on! How often does this happen? She’s a model _and_ yoga teacher!”

“Ambassador.” Bazine corrected. Rey rolled her eyes.

“Be more open to things, Rey,” he urged, “Speak later!”

Ben turned arm in arm with Bazine, the black haired woman laughing at something he had said, leaving Rey alone in the frighteningly beautiful park to shuffle her way back to the office.

Surely this was proof that even Ben, her wonderful, steadfast friend, wasn’t even himself. Ben never would have ditched her for a beautiful, random woman just because she flipped her hair in his face and batted her lashes at him.

Right?

_To be fair, when has he ever come face to face with a model from the billboard?_

What were the chances of _that_?

Rey ambled along the path, her head fuzzy and her hand distinctively without an ice cream cone. She was too irritated to eat. Every second step she felt like her body was desperate for her to trip or stumble like a dainty heroine in need of support.

She stopped, her brows knitting as she began to piece together the evidence in her head.

_I’m clumsy as fuck and everyone thinks it’s adorable…_

_Finn is a stereotype who seems intent on acting like a sidekick…_

_My apartment is perfect…_

_I have an amazing job…_

_The only woman I work with directly in the office is acting like I killed her cat…_

_MY THOUGHTS ARE BEING BROADCAST OUT LOUD…Oh. Sweet. Christ…_

“I’m in a romantic comedy…” she muttered to herself, “I have woken up in a romantic comedy!”

She shook her head, squeezing her eyes tightly closed as she rubbed at her temples. It was a coma dream. It had to be. She’d hit her head and any moment she was going to wake up to her old, grey life and she’d never take it for granted again.

Or maybe she had to make herself wake up? So far simply living wasn’t doing anything for her, and the way people were acting, it wasn’t like she was going to be heading back anytime soon.

“Alright...this is fine. This is...not fine. Retrace, Rey. Retrace and reset!” she said out loud, ignoring the curious stares from passers-by, wondering why the girl was talking to herself in the third person.

It was foolproof. Almost. Retracing her steps, Rey headed as quickly as she could without tripping over her own charmingly awkward feet towards the nearest subway station. If she hit her head again, if she knocked herself out, then she’d wake up.

That was the theory, anyway.

_It’s a shit theory. What if I die?! What if I die wearing this twee as hell outfit?_

It was all she had. Entering the subway station, she found it frustratingly charming. It was clean, everyone around her looks pleasant and polite. Not one human there looked like they were prepared to steal property from her person.

“You!” She shouted, the man she directed her voice at jumping with fright. He was the most threatening one she could find, and by that, he was the only person there wearing remotely dark colors. It was a tenuous link.

_Dark clothes does not equal mugger, Rey…_

“Mug me!”

“I’m sorry, what?!” the man cried, panic in his eyes. Rey grabbed the lapels of his coat.

“Come on, mug me! Steal my shit, knock me over!” she demanded, shaking the poor guy as he flapped and flailed to get him away from her. Eventually, she released his jacket.

“Mother warned me about girls like you!” he wailed, sprinting down the platform. Rey sighed.

_Girls like me? I highly doubt that, buddy…_

“Someone attack me!” she shouted, the commuters looking increasingly perplexed and disturbed, “This is New York. It should not be this difficult to get robbed!”

New York. The city she was always warned to be on guard in. To hold onto her bag tightly, to not look strangers directly in the eye on public transport, to not carry her valuables in plain sight. There she was, standing on a subway platform begging for someone to steal her things and knock her unconscious.

“What seems to be the problem here, Ma’am?”

The voice that spoke held so much authority, she knew it could only be a police officer. Turning to greet the voice, she almost burst out laughing. The man in front of her was NYPD alright, but if New York’s finest were sponsored by Magic Mike.

His shirt was clearly too tight for his ripped body, the edges of the sleeves hugging his biceps while his pants were so tight there was an obvious bulge. Rey would have been lying if she said she hadn’t looked.

“Nothing officer...Handsome? Really, your name is handsome?!” she cried incredulously, reading his badge.

“It’s _Handson_!”

“Oh, sorry. This place...I just kind of assumed…”

“We’ve got reports of a woman causing a disturbance down here. I’m going to need you to cool it…”

“No! You don’t understand, I was mugged here and then I got knocked out and I woke up in this weird version of New York! I need it to happen again so I can wake up!” Rey cried, flailing frantically.

Officer Handson raised an eyebrow, shaking his head as he pulled out a pair of handcuffs.

“I’m taking you to the station, Ma’am, you’re under arrest,” he said, wrapping the cuffs around her wrists and pulling her hands behind the small of her back to walk her out of the station. Rey groaned, wiggling her fingers.

“I mean...fine, but do my hands need to be next to your junk the whole time?!”

00000

Rey had never been arrested in her life but she was pretty sure this wasn’t the norm.

The station she’d been taken to was a beautiful building in the East Village, all red brick and flower displays hanging from the front with none of the real authority and intimidation that came with going to a police station. Inside, the building was just as welcoming.

“You get one phone call.” Office Handson instructed, pointing to the pay phone on the wall. Rey grimaced.

“But, I don’t have my cell phone. You took it from me...I don’t know anyone's number. This isn’t 1995!”

“Well pretend like it’s 1995.” the man shrugged, his pecks occasionally twitching in a manner that Rey deemed highly inappropriate.

“So I’ll be able to call my old house or my nana’s place. Great, that doesn’t help.”

“You’re wasting time!”

“Alright, alright, just let me think for a second!” she snapped. He might have been handsome and ready to burst out his uniform at any moment, but he wasn’t exactly polite. She inwardly sniggered. His manner was actually quite refreshing in a world where everyone was downright lovely.

She reached down into her bag, finding nothing helpful until her fingers grazed what felt like petals.

_A flower...oh, Jesus Christ…_

The white rose was pulled out her bag, looking a little worse for wear but the numbers still clearly visible on each petal. Not that they were in any kind of useful order, but this was bizzaro world as far as she was concerned and it was the only chance she had.

“Alright, lady luck, do your thing,” she muttered, randomly picking numbers from the petals and punching it into the phone.

_This is so stupid...there’s no way I’ve picked the right number out of all the possibi-_

“Hello?”

“Holy shit it worked!”

“Rey, is...is that you?” she heard Poe’s voice on the other end of the line and fought the overwhelming urge to bash her head against the wall, “I was hoping you’d call. I really feel like we had a magic conn-”

“Yes, yes it was magical. Poe, I need your help. Don’t ask questions, I’m in jail and I need you to come and bail me out.”

“Oh, well of course. Anything for you!” he declared, “I’ll come straight away!”

“That’s great. Thank you.” Rey sighed in relief. It wasn’t perfect but at least she knew _someone_ was coming to get her out of this mess. Hanging up the phone, she was lead to a holding cell.

She was stuck in a cell, in a rom-com, and since clearly getting herself knocked out wasn’t going to be an option in this place, Plan B was going to have to come into play.

Whatever Plan B actually was.

Moments later, an officer appeared.

“Rey Jackson, you’ve been bailed,” he announced, Rey stepping past him to leave. At the front desk stood Poe, a remarkably cheery smile on his face.

“Rey! Still as beautiful as ever,” he grinned, flipping his hair needlessly.

“You’ve met me once,” she muttered, signing herself out, “In fact, no, you’ve met me lots of times. It’s just the one time you _actually_ remember.”

They began to walk out of the station, descending the lovely steps out into the street of the East Village.

“I was hoping you’d call me. I really feel that we have something, Rey,” he said sincerely, stopping to stand in front of her, his hand on her shoulder and the simpering look on his face making her feel uneasy.

“Listen, something is going on here and...I don’t know how to explain it.”

“Just go ahead and get it all out. If I can fix it I will!” Poe said. Rey took a deep breath.

“I was knocked unconscious and when I woke up everything was different. The world is so _perfect_ and to make things worse people are constantly treating me like I’m special,” she said quietly, “And I am _not_ special.”

It was a strange confession. One that she hadn’t expected but suddenly her distaste for the new world around her made sense. In romantic movies, people treated the female lead as if she was something different and out of the ordinary, as if she deserved to be elevated above others. Now she was here, she found herself thrust into that spot, put on a pedestal that she didn’t ask for.

And she hated it.

Poe looked at her thoughtfully, his hand still resting gently on her shoulder.

“Still waters run the deepest,” he whispered dramatically. Rey shook her head, staring at him.

“Did you even listen to a word I just said?” The phone in his pocket rang.

“Oh, that’s my Dad calling from China. You know how it is!” he chuckled, answering the phone.

“I mean...no I don’t, but okay,” she sighed, watching the ridiculous handsome specimen wander along the road with his phone, occasionally kicking a lamp post casually, “Okay, so you’re in a rom-com. You’ve _somehow_ managed to have a chance meeting with an insanely handsome billionaire...how do these stupid movies end?”

_Falling in love, dingus!_

“Ah shit.” Rey grunted, “Well if I’m going to have to get with someone...suppose it could be worse than that guy. Fine, universe, you win!”

She watched him curiously, the way he ambled around with his phone pressed to his ear. She supposed it was meant to make him seem carefree and charming, but to Rey, it seemed more like he had balance issues.

“I don’t need to love him...he just needs to fall in love with me,” she reasoned with herself quietly. Poe wrapped up his phone call, jogging over to her like an enthusiastic but dumb labradoodle.

“I’m afraid I need to get back to the office and deal with some issues,” he sighed, “But please, Rey, have dinner with me tonight?”

_Whatever speeds this process up…_

“Yeah, sure, that sounds...great!” she said, forcing a smile. Poe grinned in return, blissfully oblivious to Rey’s hidden chagrin.

“Wonderful! I’ll send a driver to pick you up.” He said, awkwardly pecking Rey on the cheek before entering his town car. She’d been so taken aback by the motion that she hadn’t realized he’d told her nothing else until he’d closed the door.

“Wait, when? When are you picking me up? And what’s the dress code? Where are we going, I like to look at the menu first!” She shouted after the car in vain, grumbling as the car disappeared around a corner.

She was going on a date. A date in the land of picture-perfect romance. Even in the real world, she’d never exactly been the dating type. Her weekend nights were spent with Rose and a bottle of wine or eating takeout with Ben while watching crappy TV. Rose was a no-go for advice since she’d declared herself an arch rival and Ben was no doubt still off with Bazine the Yoga Ambassador.

_What the fuck even is that anyway? Countries have ambassadors...not vaguely challenging movement activities._

No, she needed an expert and in rom-com land, there was one person she could call for this kind of advice.

_Every heroine needs a gay sidekick._

“Finn, it’s Rey...I need your help…”


	4. Three Magic Words

“Alright booboo, spill the tea!”

Rey fought an eye roll combined with a hefty sneer at Finn’s flamboyant phrasing. Had it been an organic part of his personality, she’d have found no issue with it, but knowing how fake it was, his manner sat uncomfortably with her.

But he had agreed to help her, and she needed all she could get.

“I think I’ve worked out what I need to do to get things back to normal,” she explained, walking with him through her beautiful apartment towards her walk-in closet, “I need to make the _leading man_ fall in love with me,”

“Oh my God! This is _so_ exciting!” Finn squealed, throwing himself down on the velvet loveseat in the center of the closet, “It’s so dreamy! Perfect guy, perfect girl…”

“I am not perfect!” Rey insisted, “but this date needs to be,”

“And that is where I come in!” Finn cried, “Oh girl, I am going to make you look incredible. He’s not going to know what hit him!”

“That’s the hope,” Rey agreed, beginning to sort through the racks of dresses.

“Where is he taking you then?” Finn asked, joining her search for inspiration. Rey shrugged.

“He didn’t really say. He just asked me to dinner but considering this place and who asked, something tells me it’s not going to be a booth at the Olive Garden,”

“Hey don’t knock it! Those free breadsticks are damn good,” Finn commented, “Oh now I love this!” He pulled out a floor-length black dress, a solid strip of gold metal around the waist and a cascading cape falling from the sleeveless shoulders.

“Finn, it has a cape…”

“And? What’s wrong with a cape?!” He cried, handing her the gown with one hand and cradling a glass of white wine in the other, “Where did you get that?”

“What? Gotta stay hydrated boo!”

_Good lord…_

“Alright, whatever, this is still a ball gown. Isn’t it too much for a first date?” Finn shook his head firmly.

“This isn’t a first date. It’s _the_ date! You say you want this guy to fall in love with you? You better _werk_!”

“Don’t you mean work?”

“You heard me! Now go, get changed and let me think about what we’re going to do with your hair!”

“Alright alright, I’m going!” She muttered finding herself shoved into the inexplicable changing room attached to her wall-in.

_Why is this even here?! It’s my closet!_

The dress was admittedly beautiful, the black silk shimmering under her fingers, soft and smooth as butter and pleasing against her skin.

She was certain she’d never worn anything so fine and as the dress clung to every curve of her body, she felt wildly out of place.

Staring at herself in the floor to ceiling mirror, a small frown took hold, twisting her face into a mask of doubt. This wasn’t her. She wore leggings and comfortable shirts that she procured from Target. Her more extravagant purchases were Dr. Marten boots or the leather jacket she’d worn to death, milking every cent worth from it.

She was a practical person and nothing of what she saw in the mirror said practicality to her.

But practical she was and this was necessary.

“Well?” Finn shouted on the other side of the curtain, lounging back on the love seat and sipping his wine. Rey pulled back the curtain.

“Oh my God!” Finn squealed, his eyes growing suspiciously glassy, “You look...just...I can’t _even_!”

“Finn, are you crying?!”

“No!” He squeaked, “I mean, maybe...but you just look so beautiful!”

“I’m not…”

“Oh no!” He cried, jumping up from his seat and rushing to stand in front of her, his wine sloshing around in his glass. With his free hand, he grasped her chin, “I don’t want to hear that talk! Rey, you are a beautiful, amazing, smart woman and I won’t hear another word against that!”

Rey blushed furiously, the passion of his declaration and her inability to take compliments at odds.

For just a moment, she almost believed him.

“Thanks,” she mumbled, unable to articulate her thought properly. He nodded, satisfied that she wouldn’t contradict him again on the subject.

“Now, we need to do something with your hair!” He smiled, draining the last of his glass to put it down and fiddle with her brunette tresses, “I’m thinking up. We have to show off that gorgeous neck! Now, take that off so we can get you ready properly,”

Within seconds she found herself pushed back into the changing area.

_This better be worth it…_

00000

By the time Finn was done with her, Rey felt metaphorically drunk. Finn, on the other hand, was tipsy in the more literal sense, his already flamboyant personality only growing in volume.

Initially, it had bothered her, but the more time she spent in his presence, she found herself relaxing into the experience and perhaps it wasn’t _all_ as fake as she’d initially thought.

Truthfully, she didn’t have a wide network of friends. She had Rose. She had Ben. Really, she felt that was all she needed, but Ben was, well, Ben. It was hardly like she could take him shopping or discuss the latest episode of ‘Real Housewives’. Rose, as much as she loved the woman, was a little more girly than her, but still married to the idea of jeans and flip flops.

Finn, for all his volume, was a breath of fresh air. Just as fiercely supportive, but offering her a different perspective on life and relationships. The smile that finally began to pull at her lips was genuine, her spirits lightening and it was thanks to her new BFF.

A familiar town car pulled up outside her building, black and sleek but empty save for the driver who wasn’t willing to give away where she was being taken. She felt unsteady on her heels, teetering into the vehicle, puffing a sigh of relief when she finally sat down.

The drive wasn’t a long one, the car pulling up into a marina. When she emerged, Poe was standing in an impeccable suit, his white smile beaming where he stood before a gangplank to a beautiful yacht.

“Rey, you look utterly beguiling,” he purred, “Really, you’re a vision!”

“Oh, thanks!” She said sheepishly, “It only took five...hours,”

“Shall we?” He asked, offering her his arm.

“Is this yours?” She nodded towards the yacht, convinced it was bigger than her already massive apartment.

“Of course it is, silly billy!” He laughed, “I thought we could have dinner with a view!”

He escorted her onto the boat, the whole thing radiating wealth and opulence. It felt unsettling but at least she had dressed the part. The lights of the city glittered on the dark water as he led her below deck to a well-set dinner table, a professional chef standing next to it.

“Ah, Mr. Dameron, everything is ready for your meal. I have my best staff ready to see to your every need!” He said, his thick Italian accent permitting his words.

“Giovanni was kind enough to fly here from Tuscany for the occasion,” Poe explained, pulling out the chair for Rey to sit.

_Holy shit…_

“That’s, uh, very kind,” she stammered, “Isn’t that quite extravagant for a first date?” She asked as if she wasn’t already sitting inside millions of dollars worth of boat.

“Well I was going to fly us to Venice for an evening but I realized that perhaps you wouldn’t have your passport,”

_Ah yes, because that was the only flaw in that plan…_

“This is lovely though,” Rey added quickly, nodding to their server to fill her champagne glass. Poe lifted his own delicate flute in a toast.

“To the hands of fate bringing us together,”

_To a nasty bump on the head and God willing I’ll wake up soon…_

“Pretty,” she smiled awkwardly, tapping her glass against his.

Dinner was pleasant and at the very least, less awkward than she’d expected. This version of Poe seemed easy to talk to. She simply dropped a topic and he did the rest, carrying most of the conversation and relating it back to his own experiences.

“And I said to my Dad, ‘Dad, you can’t just buy Virgin Airlines without at least speaking to Richard first’,” He laughed as if it were the funniest joke told. Rey chuckled politely along, desperate to chug the bottle of white wine on the table.

Was this what he was like in the real world? Surely not. He only experience of the real Poe Dameron had been a gruff, dismissive asshole who constantly mistook her for the intern doing coffee runs. This one was charming, in a way. Like a puppy chasing its tail for no reason or a child extremely excited about an ice-cream cone.

It wasn’t difficult to get him enthusiastic about the smallest thing.

“So, I have an idea!” he grinned proudly, “I know this great little place that does the most amazing desserts. Shall we dock and take a stroll?”

“Uh, sure,” Rey agreed, unsure where would still be open by the time they parked the boat.

_Where the hell do you park a boat anyway?_

He left the table to instruct the captain of the yacht to take the boat near shore. His absence gave her a chance to drop the smile she’d been sporting, her cheeks aching with the pressure. Whatever she was feeling for Poe wasn’t love. Curiosity, perhaps. Amusement for sure but certainly not love. Not the way it was portrayed in the movies.

Within moments, she watched the boat pull up to a random harbor that she’d never seen before along the Hudson.

_Rom-Com land is fucking weird…_

“Shall we disembark my dear?” he asked, holding his arm for her that she accepted with as much grace as a permanently clumsy leading lady could muster. 

Together they left the boat, Poe leading her along the streets that glimmered in the New York lights, still damp from the showers she’d somehow missed during dinner. It wasn’t cold, but he offered his jacket anyway, wrapping the designer suit around her shoulders.

“I love the city at night,” Rey commented, enjoying their walk towards wherever he was taking her. It wasn’t her New York, not really, but in the darkness, it felt more like home.

“The beauty of the city is nothing compared to the moon captured in your eyes,” he said dreamily. Rey bit her tongue, unsure if the sentence made her queasy or if she would burst with laughter.

Neither was the right way to get the guy to say those three, stupid little words she needed to get home.

“You are...so sweet,” she forced, batting her lashes like the demure little flower she was pretending to be. Poe stopped, his face falling at the shop in front of him. The lights were off and the shutters down, the ‘Closed’ sign clearly in the door.

“Aw no, it’s closed!” he gasped, “I’m so sorry, I thought for sure they would be open!”

_I mean sure, what family fun ice cream store isn’t open at 10:34 pm…_

“It’s alright. I’m sure we can find something else. Really...Poe, what the hell are you doing?!”

He was on his hands and knees, feeling around under the doormat until he cried out in victory.

“Here we are!” he declared, holding up a key, “Let’s go!”

“You can’t just break into an ice-cream store!” she cried. Poe shrugged.

“It’s not breaking in. I have a key,” he said, “We’ll go in, take what we’d normally order and I’ll leave a few hundred on the counter,”

_Of course. How silly of me…_

She walked in behind him, Poe immediately jumping behind the counter to pull out spoons and bowls like he’d been working there all his life, constructing a fudge sundae before her eyes.

“Ta-da!”

“Thank you,” she muttered, still completely bewildered as to how she’d got herself into this situation.

Sitting in a closed ice-cream store with a possibly eccentric, but very handsome billionaire in a gown fit for a royal wedding.

Digging into her sundae, Poe spoke first.

“So, tell me about yourself, Rey?” he said, “Hopes? Dreams? Fears?”

_Hours in and now he finally asks me about myself…_

“Not much to tell really, I’m an architect, I live in Brooklyn but you already knew that…”

“Did I?”

“You drove me home…” she pointed out with annoyance, “Anyway, I live in Brooklyn and...that’s it. I guess that’s all there is to me,”

“Oh, I don’t believe that for a second,” he smiled, “There must be more to you than that!”

“I...I don’t think there is,” she replied, spooning her ice cream, “Maybe I’m just not that interesting a person?”

“I think you’re pretty interesting!”

_How would you know? You’ve spoken about yourself all night!_

“Thank you, but I’m not and I’m alright with that,” she shrugged, “Besides, I have good friends…”

_One of whom seems to hate me here and the other is away playing the hero…_

“And that’s good enough for me. I like my job, I like my friends,” she nodded. Poe was staring at her like a golden retriever. He was hearing but possibly not fully understanding the words coming out of her mouth. Nevertheless, he was just happy to be there.

“Let’s go!” he said suddenly, enthusiastically pulling dollars from his wallet to drop them on the counter. Rey frowned.

“But I’ve not finished my ice-cream…”

His reluctance to actually listen to her was beginning to turn into an annoying habit, Poe grabbing her by the hand and practically skipping out into the street. The road was mysteriously empty, the street awash with shimmering purples and blues from the lights. Rey stopped to stare at the sky, the moon unspeakably huge.

“Oh my God, look at that…”

“I know, the full moon is beautiful tonight,” Poe awed. He wasn’t wrong, but something felt very unsettling about its size. The moon surely wasn't always _that_ big?

“I mean, yeah, but I feel like that’s going to really mess with the tides and stuff…” she muttered, Poe blissfully ignoring her.

She felt his hand grabbing hers, pulling her off her feet with an undignified yelp. An arm caught her around the waist, dipping her low as if she was an unwilling participant in a tango. His eyes shone in the moonlight, his smile charming.

_He really is the perfect leading man I guess…_

She braced herself, Poe closing his eyes and leaning towards her. His lips brushed hers as she remained dipped backward in his arms, his stubble rubbing against her cheek. It was nice, she supposed.

It certainly didn’t warrant the literal fireworks that were going off overhead.

_Where the fuck did they come from?!_

“How about we take this somewhere more private?” he crooned, an eyebrow raised suggestively.

This was unexpected, but a wicked thought passed her mind. How long had it been since she’d slept with a guy? Hell, it had been so long since she’d even had a date, and if she was going to be stuck in romantic purgatory, she could at least reap the benefits.

He was good looking and there was at least a fifty-fifty chance he wouldn’t talk as much in the bedroom.

“Let’s go,”

00000

Birds were singing.

Her eyes fluttered open as she felt the silk sheets below her.

_Where the hell am I now? Jesus did Prince Charming slip me a rom-com roofie?!_

The last thing she remembered was kissing him, of him dancing her towards the bedroom of his lavish penthouse. Now she found herself lying back in bed. Lifting the sheets, she glanced down at her body.

“Pink satin pajamas?!” she hissed, “I...what even?!”

Across from the bed, the door to the ensuite bathroom opened in a cloud of steam, Poe emerging wearing only a towel. Rey tilted her head, appreciating the view at the very least.

“Good morning beautiful,” he smiled, “Last night was absolutely amazing! I lo-”

“Wait!” Rey cried, “Before you say anything else, I need to know...did we have sex?”

“Yeah, we did and, wow, you were something else!”

“Are you kidding me, universe, really?!” She cried, “I finally get _something_ out of this whole thing and you go all PG-13 on me? This is bullshit!” she shouted at the ceiling, Poe giving her a nervous smile. “Urgh, anyway, sorry...you were saying?”

“I was saying, last night was amazing…”

This was it. The look in his eyes, that dreamy far off gaze. The smile on his face. The fact she’d apparently rocked his world the night before. He was going to say it. He was going to say it and finally, she could go home. She closed her eyes.

“I love you,”

Nothing. There was no magical pixie dust or warmth. The earth didn’t shatter, there was no loud clap of thunder. A woman in a huge pink puffy dress didn’t appear to wave a magic wand. Rey opened her eyes, staring at him in horror.

“Say it again,” she demanded, “Cause, um, you know us girls...we just _love_ to hear it,”

“I love you,”

He said it once more, and once more nothing happened.

“Ah, shit…”


End file.
